Monthly Blog - June 2018

Be Careful of the Ninth Letter of the Alphabet

@agrimanners
Ready, Set... Time to Say Please and Thank You Again.

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The ninth letter of the Greek alphabet is Iota.

It is written uppercase and lowercase. The first known use of “I” was before the 12th century.

The definition of “I” can mean (among other things):

  • A grade rating a student’s paper as ‘incomplete’.
  • Someone possessing an individual personality—a self—can be known as “I”.
  • a speech counterpart of orthographic i

How does the ninth letter of the alphabet represent civility/manners?
Consider the following statements:

  • I want to do it this way.
  • I for one do not agree.
  • I personally am offended by your actions.
  • I don’t like it.

Now consider the above statements written from another perspective:

  • We would like to do it this way.
  • We have a different take on it.
  • We would like to revisit the procedure.
  • Our team has a different take—can we share it with you?

Can you hear the difference in meaning and tone?

We need to be clear that people do need to take care of self: physically, emotionally, nutritionally, spiritually. After all, if we are not at our personal best, then it will be more difficult for us to be at our best around others. We all have ups and downs. Such is life.
However, your mood should never dictate your manners. It doesn’t matter how angry, upset, or sad you are. Always be respectful & polite to others. If you are feeling crabby or out of sorts, a good response is, “I’m feeling a little out of sorts today. Can we revisit this tomorrow?” Do not say something you will regret later.

If we focus only on “I”, rather than “we”, we run the risk of sounding self-centered and narcissistic. If the “I” is reinforced for the individual over a period of time, it can result in people repelling you because on the surface, it appears as uncaring, and even rudeness. Lack of empathy is often what people feel as a result.

In my career, I have worked for terrific bosses…and some, well, not so terrific. The best managers were those who rarely spoke in “I”, but rather, “We…”
“We” encourages: Commonality, esprit de corps, camaraderie, shared aims, unity, bond, connections, needs.

Consider the following phrases, which include “I” in a healthy, inclusive, respectful way:

  • I can only imagine.
  • I love you.
  • May I help?
  • I love working with you.
  • I miss you.
  • I do.
  • I own it.
  • I’m so thankful.
  • I’m on it. Not to worry.

How does the ninth letter of the alphabet represent civility/manners?

Be cautious of your “I”. Take care of self but give focus and attention to “we and us” rather than “I”, “they”, “them”.

Be careful of the ninth letter of the alphabet.

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Ready, Set…time to say please and thank you again.

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Remember: Share your goodness, far and wide, as much as you can, with as many people as you can, for as long as you can, with as much respect as you can.

Ready, Set…Time to Say Please and Thank You again.

 

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The Four Legs of the Table: Four Things All Well-Mannered People Do Daily
   June 2017